Army Change.

zooooom and its been a month ever since i been into army, have i changed some may ask. i did, indeed i did. physically and mentally of cos, 5 days, 3 physical training(PT) lessons per day. of cos i've become bigger? this is my third bookout, its been better than the last two i guess. but things aren't really the same anymore, i don't know how to explain. feels like i've disconnected from everyone, living my own world with my bunk mates. whats with this transition, am i going to hang out with my bunkmates more? am i gonna slowly drift from my ever strong SA clique? the topics become lesser, the actions become displeasing. this is weird. why do i think i feel more comfortable with my bunkmates sometimes.

a test of friendship? i did try to meet them and talk to them. din really seem to work. its the same, if i don't ask, nobody would. issit true that friends come, friends go? i'm starting to feel they are going under the category "church friends" than the brothers that we used to be. stuff i say now fall to the ground. feathers that follow where the wind blows. where do i go, who do i turn to? there are definitely two sides to this story. this is just my part of it.

P.S i found some colors in my little black & white world.

Christmas.

it's a dull one this year, nobody to spend time with. nothing seems like christmas, everything seems like nothing. if i know it'd be like that, i would rather not book out. i figured my only fear is loneliness. FML.

happy birthday jesus.

11th december 2009.

the day i turn 19 and the day i embark on my army life. i know its not gonna be easy. but ya like its part of life for a singaporean male. its gonna be 2 years, i'm gonna miss my family especially my mum and grandma, my friends, my GUYS, my guys' girls, close girl-friends like swee, fiona, peilin and GWEN. my cellgroup members, my cellgroup leaders and everyone that i know personally but is not mentioned here. i'm scared, excited yet sad. hope it'll be a breeze. special ppl to thank!

first of all, CHX!

dude, you're really the man running the show for me. help me plan this help me plan, plan for my birthday and everything. you're someone really close to my heart, tho recently little bit of i would say "misunderstandings" but ya, if u trust me. know that i have your interests at heart. even tho i'm a B, but ya all i can say is trust me.

DS!

fatty sim, i love you. you hear my every problem and gives me from a perspective i dont see from my angle. its great to have you around cos you light up the atmosphere and its really great to see u happy now. but please, if u see our footprints on that road, flee from it. you know what i mean..

FHY!

freddy! the one that amongst them most similar to me, its good to be like me, but learn the good stuff if possible. its good to have someone who's always clear headed about things and i really thank you for being the one that's most burdened for our spiritual lives. appreciate it.

EDOMANDO!

the man behind the scenes, the andrew that helps the peter. i admire your humility and undying spirit, you dont usually say no to favours. thats the best part about you, frankly its super good to know that you're a leader for this camp. you heard lots of shit from us over the years, you have what it takes to shine and do well, dont for once think of giving up. if there's one person who definitely can do anything amongst us, that person is YOU.

JC!

you excel in everything you do, that is the truth - prodigy. there's nothing u can't catch up with others, its really great to have u in the clique. cos frankly anything that comes to the physical, we have no fear cos we have u. just tune down your loud hailer, perfect.

YG!

this name is ancient, but you are the guy who knows everything single detail that happened in my life. like i said, if there's a need for my biography, you're the one who can write it best. cos ya you're like a spectator of us and especially me. just quit that.

AFRED!

you're the latest addition to the family, i really thank you so much for availing yourself for our dinners and the surprise ytd. even you have your test on the next day its still so good of you to come. i love you man. anything from now just ask us, AWAL also go. LOL JOKING.

JARED!

jared, i always say things from my heart to you. you're my first leader and no matter what i'll still respect you not cos you're just a leader but you really earned my utmost respect. i really learned alot in the past few years when i was helping you and sometimes i really got so inspired by you, i still rmb when you telling me you were tearing while msn-ing me, i got so touched and changed my perspective of you since then. thank you so much Jared. thank you for everything.

Cicilia

CC!! im so happy you came down to surprise me!! like i know u stay so far but u still made the effort to surprise me and i was inspired by you alot. knowing you have major exams and you still make time calling us and praying with us. showing us that shining for God and doing your own stuff is definitely possible. thanks CC!

GWENDOTAN

GIRL-FRIEND!! hahhaha i thank you soooo much too. the fact that you came down and surprise me with the guys, i know you're super tired cos of the camp and being a leader is tiring. i so appreciate it. and your dream of being a team leader came true! shine for GOD HOLY GWEN!!

sweeeeee.

my special friend! somehow i think we click cos we're of the same surname. but whatever, i'm so happy we got to know in CHEC. like ever since then you're always been a SA guy. hahahah i really enjoy hanging out and spending time with you always. please protect yourself and take good care of your weak body, go to school, drink water and dont smile too wide and and 10 11 11 12 11 12 10!! ok i sound like your mum, again.

LAST OF ALL, A BIG THANK YOU FOR EVERYONE THAT CAME TO SURPRISE ME!!

i'm seriously outta time, thanks kenneth, dannon, peilin and fiona! you guys are just great.

i'll see everyone in a week or so, i'll still be on twitter, so do tweet me.

Bad Romance.


what a song!

it speaks to me,

The way it should have been, all along.


an answer i can only refer it , absurd. what more can i say. i did my part, i've no regrets.

i will never look back.




Don't bother me, with anything.
I rule my world.

11th December.

a date i always anticipated, now for new reasons.
i just can't wait, Bring it on National Service!
SHAVE MY HEAD.

swallow the ego,
shave my pride.

Home.

Definitely, a home and a house are two separate things or, situations rather. a house is somewhere you go back too, to rest or relax. a home is place where you know no matter how bad sometimes life can be, its a place you know you are able to find the help that you need and a sense of belonging. i used to have a home, then it became a house then it remained a house. as of today, its 15th august on the lunar calender. 20 years ago, on this very day, my mum got married to my dad. 20 years later, its just a day to think back on how foolish a person can get. what can we say or do when things are already like that? suck it up and move on i guess. its been 3 years since that incident, a joy ride it has been. me and my mum has been given freedom? lol we've been going out more than before, drinking more than before, smoking more than before, putting tattoos more than before ( ok only 1 la), spending more than before. we only have each other and only each other, nobody to protect, to provide and to decide for us, whether we live or die, its up to us.

Again definitely, we're still alive and having a stable life. kinda rough week i had, been thinking alot. my petite other half has also been talking alot of sense to me, like my mum working so hard and studying so hard just to earn that money and i'm spending it as if we're loaded. it struck me hard, i'm sure i realised how much of a brat i was. ahhh so i did some sorting out and decided yea its just time to do something bout it.

Then again definitely, my petite other half has been a big help and support to me. i'm just so thankful for her, being patient and sometimes tolerating my bad habits. thank GOD with all my heart. my mum and her has been getting along smoothly also. crazy mum gave her shoes but told me to take a dollar from her because of the superstition, but i charged 50cents instead, and mummy also thought of buying a bag for her. haha what a lovely sight. PRAISE GOD!

Family @ wedding dinner
this is HOME.

me & smexy anti-aging mum.
psst, she doesn't use skin products!!

me and petite other half.
STOP DRINKING BABE!

So life has been great, and funky. happy and contented with the little things i have. looking forward to the future and definitely i wouldn't want to end up in his* shoes. heh live life, love life. ciao~

OHOHOHOH, i forgot. for girls who love shopping and guys who love to splurge and spoil your girls. please come down to the shop my mum's helping out at, i guarantee you they have good and IN stuff. believe me, i was a fashion student and still a fashion lover.

here are some sneak pics of their new stock :

this is not for sale,
just what the lady boss bought for her.
i mean dangg, she has good taste right?
super cool one of a kind skull bag.

another bag that my mum got from the shop,
super cool, black simple yet studded.
WILD~~

THANKS FOR READING.
IF YOU WANNA KNOW WHERE IS THE SHOP, ASK ME.
EMAIL ME @ haruko-kaito@hotmail.com

bye.